Mr. Literal

There is no room for exaggeration or joking with a 3 year old. He takes things you say to heart and and their word.

At Christmas, his Uncle Chad greeted him with a rousing, "I like to eat little boys" or something like that. You know...just kidding around. An excuse to tickle. No big deal. Andrew immediately informed his uncle that, "We don't eat people. Just food." For the next day at least this mantra was repeated. I think he's still a little wary when we talk about his cannibalistic uncle.

I should have learned. But in the land of sarcasm and exaggeration that is my house, it is really hard to remember all the time.

Andrew was jumping on my bed a few weekends ago, and grabbed his toy broom. (what, you may ask, is my child doing jumping on my bed? And furthermore, why is there a toy broom readily available next to said bed? If only you could witness the sad state of my house, and you would understand). Anyhoo, I quickly told him that we couldn't jump with things in our hands because we could poke an eye out. Jeff happened to be there, so I told him the story about my neighbor growing up whose older brother actually poked her eye out with a stick. She had a glass eye when she was 9 (or younger...I can't really remember). I wasn't really thinking about Andrew soaking in every word. But for the last week, he asks me 15 times a day, "Do I have 2 eyes, Mom?" He is very concerned about the state of his eyes.

A MONTH ago, Andrew refused to wear socks. I keep our house at a crisp 66 degrees...so it is really too cold to walk around without socks. I told him he'd better watch out, because without socks his toes may turn into Popsicles and Mommy loves to eat Popsicles. Fast forward to Grandma's arrival this weekend. Saturday morning she told Andrew she wanted to put socks on before going downstairs. Andrew's response? "That's good because Mommy likes to eat your toes."

So beware...visitors of Andrew's house. He will believe every word you say!